You'll learn things you never knew, you never knew

Today I happened upon a blog post listing 10 Japanese Travel Tips for Visiting America. It's from February 2016, and I'm a fan of Mental Floss, so I've probably read it before. After a year as an American living in Japan, however, it's a really interesting read. Some things that stood out to me were their suggestions on laughter (Americans laugh loudly - Japanese do not) and slow cashiers (the Japanese cashiers are incredibly efficient). They are also not wrong about the dinner dishes and table settings. I definitely laugh more loudly than the locals (something that was really noticeable at the showing of Allegiance - no one ever laughed out loud except the four of us), but I can definitely get behind the efficient cashiers and flavorful foods. We've also discussed our love for Japanese vending machines.

Fortunately, even though I know I do things differently, I try my best and I feel like the Japanese are a patient people. They are more embarrassed personally when gaijin (foreigners) can't understand something and do it wrong, because they should have made it easier for you. I've never once felt shamed because I made a mistake, and I've made plenty.

I think that it is really key just to try. Just try, in whatever country you're traveling, to do your best and you'll be okay. Things will be different from whatever you're used to, sometimes wildly so, and expecting the same treatment or experience that you would at home will limit your opportunities to learn and experience new things. Learn a few words in the language, travel the way locals do, and just try! Really, what's the point of traveling otherwise?

Some people never leave home or try new things or do anything differently than they've ever done. And, really, that's fine. If those people are happy, then I am happy for them. But I don't understand those people. There is a great big world out there and I want to see as much of it as I can! I'm not as well traveled as some, but like I said - I try. And that counts for a lot.

Paris, Christmas 2007

London, Christmas 2007

Cairo, May 2010

Cairo, May 2010

Tucson, September 2010

New York City, 2015

Seoul, August 2017

Kamakura, October 2016

Remember me, though I have to say goodbye

I'm a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, also known as the Mormons. When possible on Sundays, I discuss some things related to my faith and what I believe. With respect to your own beliefs, I hope this gives you a chance to get to know me and my religion a little better. For previous installments, click here.

I am pleased to say that on Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, after our (mis)adventure in Kamakura, I spent some time learning about indexing through familysearch.org, per my goal to find a way to keep my sights on the temple even when I can't attend. I did the tutorial and then indexed my first batch - a page from the US, New York, New York - Death Index, 1880-1956. I've done a lot of data entry in my career as a librarian and this program is set up to be really user friendly, so it was all pretty easy to figure out.

Even though it wasn't my own family history I was working on, I imagined that I was being helpful to someone out there. This index had death dates and cities, as well as the death certificate number, which if they could use that to find the actual death certificate they would probably find even more information. OCR (optical character recognition) has come a long way, so it's possible just having a photo of this index would be useful, but an indexed page even more so.  The batch I worked on didn't take long, and I definitely anticipate doing more!

On Saturday, with this project on my mind, Blake and I went to see the latest Pixar film - Coco - a story about a Mexican boy who learns a lot about his family on the Day of the Dead, even traveling to the Land of the Dead. So many elements of the story - multi-generational family, music, deteriorating mental health in old age, healing, honoring family who have passed, second chances (even after death) - were woven in such a beautiful way that I was crying by the end, even with parts that were relatively predictable. I think it's right there with Up for my favorite Pixar film, and even already one of my favorite movies ever. It's so well done!

And then, this morning, while it was Saturday evening back at home, I was able to FaceTime with my grandmother at the start of the party they were having for her 80th birthday. After I talked to her, my dad took me around the party to say hi to a few people and see some of the amazing quilts that my grandmother had made (not an exhaustive collection, if only because I have a few here in Japan) as well as the top of one that my mother had made for her out of squares she had commissioned from the family. They had it set up at the party so everyone could work on the actual quilting of it. My dad promised to sew a stitch for me.

Many people made their own quilt squares, but due to distance/time/skill, I just designed one, ordered the fabric, and commissioned it from my mother. It's the pink and green crossword puzzle one shown here. The green fabric has thimbles on it - Grandma collects them and I've helped a lot on all my travels - and she and Grandpa (while he was alive) loved doing crossword puzzles. It was helping them on one that earned me one of their nicknames for me.

Even being 7000 miles away from my family of origin, I've had a lot of opportunity to think about them and connect with them these last few days. I'm so glad to know where I come from and find ways to relate to the experiences of those who have come before me. Hopefully, I can get back into the habit of family history research and keep finding out even more!

I can't wait to meet Virginia

Malcolm has a best friend - an Australian Shepherd named Virginia. She's about the same size, age, and energy level as Malcolm, which makes them a really good match. Her parents are also good friends of ours, and it's nice when both families get along so well. Virginia's parents arrived in Japan in August of 2016, but Virginia didn't join them until December. After meeting her mom and learning about Virginia, I predicted that she and Malcolm would be great buds and I'm pleased to say that I was absolutely right.

So happy!

Ready to go!

Heart shaped snuggles

Bedtime

Virginia lives off base, but in the same town our housing detachment is in (Zushi). So, she's close by for play dates and dog-sitting swaps, both of which we do frequently. We've established a pretty liberal policy for each dog to stay with the other family when needed, so you'll often find Malcolm at her house or Virginia at ours and we meet up at the dog park even more.

This afternoon, anxiously waiting for Blake to throw the ball already. Their eyes are my favorite part.

When they are together, there is a lot of Puppy Wrestlemania and tug of war over toys. They pal around and sniff things together and just have an undeniable bond that none of us have really enjoyed with other dogs before.

Of course, when Malcolm is at Virginia's house, I hope he's behaving himself and doing well. It turns out he is an excellent bug hunter (Virginia couldn't be bothered) and helps keep an eye on Virginia's human baby brother. He also has developed a keen ability to find lost pacifiers. Giving them up is a different story.

At Virginia's house, watching Virginia's mom and the baby

At our house, Virginia is also well-behaved and we are glad for Malcolm to have such a good buddy. They keep each other entertained and active.

Found this photo today of Malcolm freaked out at the airport while make final arrangements for our flight to Japan. I don't blame him, but I think things have worked out okay since.

Virginia is spending the Thanksgiving holiday with us, and if Malcolm is grateful for anything this year, I'm sure his best friend is on the list.

Hanging out while their moms have lunch

Oh. I- Ahahahaha oh, I thought, ohhh. What a hilarious misunderstanding.

Every time I go to Kamakura, a town nearby that is just old and small and traditional enough to be popular for day-tripping Japanese people from Tokyo and that we also love, I feel like I can assess how I'm doing with my cultural assimilation and language acquisition. It was the first place we visited off-base after we arrived and were incredibly overwhelmed and so tired. So as much as we loved it, a lot of it was one big blur at the time. When I went back for my second visit, it went a whole lot better, and every time I've gone back I can measure against previous experiences.

Today was no different. We went to Kamakura and went to the same yakiniku place we went to the first time and we both felt a lot more confident about the situation today. It's our favorite yakiniku restaurant so far, so we will be taking any visitors here.

Then, we went to a store we like for Christmas gifts and I handled the conversation in more Japanese than English than last year and I even wrote the names for the orders in Japanese!

Totally copied this from a note I'd put together while we were on a train, and I definitely need practice, but I still feel really good about this - even if the woman at the shop ultimately corrected how I spelled the fourth name. She understood it all, and that's a win!

Unfortunately, things went a little downhill from there. While we waited for our order at the other shop, we went to a nearby cafe that does really impressive latte art. Much of the art is Disney-themed from what I've seen of friends' visits, the cafe is charmingly decorated, and the music playing was delightful jazzy piano covers of Disney songs.  I ordered Blake's hot chocolate to be decorated with Stitch and my hot caramel milk with Mount Fuji. The waitress confirmed our orders and with a "kashikomarishita" ("of course") was off. Several minutes later (good latte art takes time), Blake's adorable Stitch drink came, followed some minutes later by mine, which wasn't exactly what I expected.

It was super well-done, whatever it was. So, while we sipped our tasty drinks, I read the receipt, which was all in katakana, and tried to decipher what she thought I'd ordered.

What I thought I'd asked for:
フジサン
Fuji-san

Took this photo from Zushi Beach after Typhoon Lan cleared out.

What I got:
フリーザ
Furiiza

Still impressed

Turns out she thought I'd asked for a Dragon Ball character named Frieza, a thing I did not know existed before this afternoon. But now I do! It was an understandable and amusing misunderstanding. Among our friends there is a phrase for the things that get misunderstood by any party or problems on trains or at stores or just the challenges of life in this country - Japan Tax. This was definitely a Japan Tax situation. I'll just have to try this cafe again, and ask for Mount Fuji in English instead. 

It was a lovely afternoon in one of our favorite places, and then we came home for naps and second Thanksgiving, which was also lovely. I do love our little adventures and Blake's extra days off. 

On a sea of love and a thankful heart

I really have so much to be thankful for today. After a few years of doing a quiet Thanksgiving with just the two of us and then last year joining some friends, we finally hosted Thanksgiving dinner for the first time. We kept it relatively small so that we didn't overwhelm ourselves with people, but it felt like we still managed to cook or prep for most of the 24 hours leading up to dinner and I've lost track of how many times we ran the dishwasher, but it was worth it! We had a great meal and a great time. And we got to use our new plates!

It's been a really interesting year. There have been some downs, but a lot of ups and so many adventures. I'm grateful to be able to share it with Blake and Malcolm and the many friends we've made here, some who feel more like family now. I never would have predicted that I would end up living the life I am. It's more amazing than I even dreamed and I feel like it's just going to get better.

I made enough food to feed everyone and all our guests brought at least two more dishes each. There was a LOT of food and it was all amazing. Except the potatoes, which I somehow screwed up. Oh well!

Pinterest worthy? Meh. But just right anyway.

Virginia is allergic to poultry, so she didn't get any, and Malcolm didn't get any out of solidarity, but they still hung out under the table for much of the meal.

Malcolm love attacks one of our guests. They had a nice snuggle after this. 

This isn't to say that there won't be hard times, but I have 100% success rate of getting through those before - I can get through whatever is next.

Life is good, friends. Life is really, really good.

With typical folks doing things in a typical way

To be honest, I don't really have a typical day. I have a typical morning routine in getting up with Blake and sending him to work, and we have a typical bedtime routine every night, but without a job or kids, everything in between just kind of depends on the day. My schedule is fairly open and might include a class (taiko or contemporary dance, mostly), a dog walk (finally officially approved by the base to be a petsitter/dog walker), or a meeting for church (I'm second counselor in Relief Society(women's ministry)). If it's musical season at the high school, I probably have rehearsal. And I tend to run most of the family errands, since I have the time.

This schedule does leave lots of time for solo adventures or social time with friends. This week, for example, I've been to an onsen with Summer (another thing that I introduced her to, despite having lived here for 7 years) and went to Relief Society cooking group. But that's not every day. Some days are just errands and life. Today was a day like that.

I got up this morning at 5:30am, when Blake got home from his run with Malcolm. I cooked breakfast, which we ate together, and then Blake was off to the shuttle. After he left, I dawdled on the internet for a few minutes, then started some bread to bake and got showered and ready for the day whilst listening to Hamilton.  

After getting the bread out of the oven and taking Malcolm on a bathroom break, I head out to the train. I thought I was leaving lots of time to get to my hair appointment, but as I transferred trains, I remembered that my appointment was 30 minutes earlier than I thought, so I'm actually running late. Oops! 

Ultimately, I was only about ten minutes late, and it was a much needed haircut. 

Afterwards, I returned my latest library book (The Impossible Knife of Memory by Laurie Halse Anderson) and then met up with Blake to go to the post office (package from his mom that we can't open until December!) and lunch (delicious curry at an Indian restaurant just off base). Blake had to head back to work for a few hours, so I picked up a few things at store on the way to the train station and headed home, where I took a little nap with Malcolm and generally lazed about.

Eventually, I got back in the kitchen and started Thanksgiving prep - toasting bread and cooking sausage and vegetables for stuffing, assembling the green bean casserole (from scratch!) that I'll actually bake tomorrow, cutting carrots, and cooking the custard for ice cream - while watching The Great British Baking Show. 

Blake came home somewhere in there and started helping, and eventually we took a break to cook some okonomiyaki for dinner which we ate while watching Madam Secretary. Malcom's best friend, Virginia, is here for the rest of the week, so we had an audience.

Now, I'm blogging, he's playing a computer game, and we're watching The Andy Griffith Show. At 10:30pm, it's an hour past our usual bedtime, but we don't have to get up as early tomorrow. 

I know it's a luxury to have such a flexible life right now. It hasn't always been that way, nor will it always be, so I'm enjoying it for the time being! Life in Japan is great, but sometimes it's just life - nothing terribly exciting, but still good.

Previous days in my life - January 2010 and October 2008.

When you have to go potty, stop, and go right away

Japan is incredibly clean. Even without garbage cans on the streets, most people carry their refuse with them home or deposit it in the appropriate receptacle in a convenience store. Even on garbage days in residential neighborhoods, the waste is neatly organized and ready for pickup. It’s not perfect - you do occasionally see some stray trash - but it’s pretty darn good.

(The exception to this rule is on Sunday morning when we have to walk through a rather seedy part of town to get to church. After a night of partying at bars and strip clubs (that’s sometimes still going on at 8:30am), there are frequently way more cigarette butts and other paraphernalia littering the roads and sidewalks. We’ve seen more than one drunken walk of shame and smelled urine and we’ve even followed a trail of blood for a few blocks. We also got applauded walking by some people once, but no idea what that was about.)

But otherwise, Japan is exceptionally clean.

Japan also has a plethora of public restrooms. They can be found in every train station and sometimes just around, unattached to any other building. Since the Japanese people are clean, every public restroom I’ve seen so far is also well taken care of. Whenever I’ve needed one, it hasn’t taken long to find one and be at ease with its level of cleanliness.

But sometimes I am not at ease with the actual toilet.

Squat toilet - I have had some difficulty learning how to use these. I think I have figured it out, but I still don't prefer these if I can afford them.

Most often it’s a Western style toilet. Frequently, if there is a squat toilet in one stall, a Western toilet is in another. Sometimes there will be signs indicating what to expect on the stall doors, and sometimes not. If you have to go badly enough, you may not be able to wait for your preference.

What’s really snazzy are these toilets:

Often these kinds of toilets have heated seats (seriously amazing in the winter), plays water sounds to mask any sounds you might be making (sometimes optional, sometimes automatic), a water spray you can direct to different areas (especially helpful for the females). You can even adjust the water pressure and temperature! I’m fairly confident we will buy one or two that you can install on a home toilet sooner or later. These are definitely my favorite toilets out in town. Generally, the nicer the building, the nicer the toilet, but you really never know what you're going to run into.

I also have found some toilet signs that amuse me.

This was in a very nice building in South Korea - Even the toilet signs were dressed nicely!

It's so cold in Sapporo, Japan, that even the toilet signs are bundled up.

In case you need a floor plan of the restroom.

I am definitely grateful for clean, easy to find restrooms. Major bonus points when they have a heated seat!

I'd like to buy the world a Coke and keep it company

I like soda. I try not to drink it too much, a few a week on average, sometimes more and sometimes less. All the vending machines around don't help me avoid soda that much (or do they?), nor do all the fun regional flavors and varieties we have around to try!

Jelly soda - You shake it up and little pieces of gelatin mix in with the soda. It's definitely strange, but worth trying.

This was supposed to be a mystery flavor - tasted something like bubble gum, sort of..

Blake was in the country for 19 hours between assignments one weekend. I shared this photo of us sharing the Halloween Pepsi with our families after he left to let them know we'd been able to see each other.

C.C. Lemon is a yummy lemon soda - They had Halloween faces on the bottles this year. Yes, it was marketing to get you to buy it. Yes, it worked on me. 

It's also nice to get a more familiar favorite (though is in Korea). Japanese versions of American sodas do seem to be a little more carbonated, but otherwise taste the same.

There are definitely more, but these are some notable favorites. We also like Pepsi Strong, Mitsuya Cider, and all the varieties of Fanta we've founds so far. Much like KitKats, we tend to keep our eyes open for new things in the soda department. In fact, here's one Blake found today.

Supposedly, this tastes like a Japanese Christmas cake - genoise sponge cake with whipped cream and strawberries.

We haven't tried it yet, but I'm looking forward to it! And then I'll probably need to order us a real Christmas cake and compare the two. It's a tough job, but someone has to do it.

Anyone have other favorites I should be looking out for?